Nature is my soul medicine and now that I have been able to get out of bed these last two months I am loving, more than ever, being in my garden, on mountain tops, under trees and wading along cold creeks. I have had a lot of interesting commentary regarding my diagnosis of cancer. Some people say its bad karma, some say that it was a poor frame of mind, others say I am being punished, but none of these proposals feel accurate or sensible. It’s actually quite ironic, I considered myself a very healthy person prior to my diagnosis. I have been eating clean food for years, a practitioner of mindfulness, positive psychology, yoga and meditation, and I’ve used all natural, non-toxic products and maintained relatively ‘ideal’ standards of living. I think that in all reality, I am a product of compromised genetics, a weak immune system and a significant amount of stress accumulated over the course of my life. I am a very sensitive being in a very hectic and toxic world and perhaps I am a product of a sick planet. I believe that I am not separate from nature, but that her and I are extensions of one another. When she is sick, I am sick, and when she is healed and restored I am healed and restored.
Last week I was sitting in my garden contemplating the arrival of spring. As I sat in my stone circle and honored the season’s transition into spring, I set an intention to have patience with my healing. Just as seeds wont grow unless blessed with patience, my health and restoration won’t renew without time. This past fall and winter has been the darkest and most introverted yet, and in the shadows I trust that a new beauty, resilience and strength will be born for the Earth as well as myself. The stillness of winter laid solid ground to house the roots and shoots of spring blossoms. I sat for nearly an hour, absorbing the sounds, energies and sensations of my garden and embodying the seed and spring essence, taking it in and breathing it out. Loving the life within nature and in gratitude for the life within me. I could feel deep within me a rising of growth, an awakening of unexpressed potential breaking through the layers of soil that have kept me quite and receptive to the bitter, yet meaningful, lessons of life. I closed my eyes and felt myself as a seed, well tended, nourished, and rising toward the light.
When time came to open my eyes, they softly and more clearly observed my secret garden. The colors and textures more vibrant and brilliant and my place among nature more assured. I ‘asked’ to be shown something to reflect upon. My senses eventually wandered to the area where I had planted ceremonial gourd seeds, and there I saw a magical green head literally pushing its way out of the desert ground. I lay down, pressing my body as close to the earth as I could to see the seedling reach from the horizon. I lay there watching this seed sprout….I actually watched it in its sprouting process. Breathtaking! What timing and intention and presence! What a gift! As I observed the new leaf emerge from the dirt and the growth within my soul rise again, I felt reciprocity, interconnectedness and a sense of restoration and resilience within nature that symbolizes hope, possibility and new life. This is the little one making its way up and out of the winter bed and into the promise of spring.
Happy Spring! Blessings, Namaste, Aho,
Robin Afinowich
Thank you to those of you who attended the Spring Equinox celebration. Here is some more information about the sacred cucumber ceremony. Have patience with your seeds!!
